I don't wanna . . .but I'm gonna.

I've had to repeat that mantra many times today.  It's been chilly (40 degrees or so), with rain all day.  As I write this, it's sleeting.  But the critters are still relying on yours truly.  Good thing the chickens don't seem to mind seeing me in a slicker and wellies.  The horses are less equananimous.  They always give me funny looks when my slicker flaps in the driving wind.  Ah well, at least they have something to eat.

I thought I had had that point driven home while breastfeeding my 2 kiddos.  Yep, every 3 hours . . .I don't wanna, but I'm gonna.  Night or day.  Hot or cold.  Whether I'm in the middle of doing something else or not.  And heck, just being a mom--I'm sick, but I've still gotta feed my family and they need clean clothes to put on.  But it's amazing how much I didn't get it.  Suiting up (literally) depending on the weather to haul my sorry butt out to the barns to feed (and check for eggs) up to 5 times a day demands real dedication.  Indoor mommying is MUCH easier than outdoor mommying.

And ya know, dedication is pretty rare these days.  Most members of the upcoming generation (and many of my generation, I'm sorry to say) don't have the "I'm gonna" gene.  If it's not convenient, if they're not "entitled,"  or simply because they're supporting a half-assed cause that they haven't had any experience with . . .they've lost the "I'm gonna."  They've lost the ground-level connection with themselves, others, and the land.  Few things drive that home better than close contact with your FAMILY (not your facebook friends), the animals or children in your care, and just plain work ethic. 

It has been my privelege to know an amazing young man.  Despite severe asthma, he competed in mountain bike races (AND WON!).  He's become an amazing artist.  He's definitely got the "I'm gonna" gene.  (Yes, Oli, I mean you!)  Another friend suffered a gunshot wound to the spine and is paralyzed from the waist down.  He's still making his living and raising his daughter.  (Gonna Gene).  A best friend of mine left a well paying job and is busting her butt to make her dream work--a yarn store.  Farmers every day get out that gonna gene--no matter what the weather's like, they're gonna get out there and feed YOU. 

I'll end for tonight with a quote (maybe a paraphrase?) from Gladiator:  "Sometimes I get to do the things I want to do.  The rest of the time I do what I HAVE to."  Guess what, kids?  Those sometimes come a lot less than you want them to.  But hey, when you've done what you HAVE to, you can enjoy it more when you get to do what you WANT to.